5 Steps to Conquering Your Fears

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So many people go through life wishing they could do more, achieve more, progress more, but fear rules them and the direction of their lives. Some have walked away from business ventures because they feared failure, others missed out on the promotion because they were afraid they weren't good enough to put their name in the hat. Regardless of what fear it is, fear is a very real and a negative force in your system.

The Fear Factor is just that to me, a factor in which I allowed to have power and eventually become a roadblock toward achieving my dreams. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “what if your biggest achievement or your perfect dream is just on the other side of your fear?” As a coach I have said it, pushed it and helped others move past the fear and achieve some amazing things. Coaching, guiding, and holistic healing are engrained in my soul, and I have done all that I could to obtain the proper tools to ensure my success.

My fear is emotional. The fears of judgment, failure for myself and failing those that depend on me. When the fear would start creeping around the corner, the “What if’s” would begin to fill my head and WHAM I was slammed back into the “no” zone and all the reasons why “it,” whatever the "IT" was that I was trying to achieve, was lost in that very moment.

I used to say, “I can’t speak publicly, I have terrible stage fright.” I have since realized it’s not stage fright, it’s actually the idea of being judged if I mess up, forget my words, ramble off topic, and so on. That is where my fears lived, fed and thrived! I won’t say that I have totally overcome my fears or that I am some badass that can take on anything that comes her way, but I will definitely say I am getting stronger and my fears are getting weaker with every step.

It’s not some scientific or medically proven way of doing things, but I will say this worked for me. Below are 5 simple steps I practice still today to keep moving forward. The most important component to overcoming fear is having the determination and will power to do so.

Below are five suggestions in overcoming fear:

1. Identify your fears

Take time to figure out your fears and ask yourself why you have them. I promote Journaling in my practice. You can always analyze each fear individually so you can better understand the reason behind it.

2. Confide in someone

Don’t feel embarrassed about discussing your fears with a close friend or family member, they may share the same fear or have one similar. Maybe they can offer advice on overcoming them. There is no shame in talking it out, even if you don’t find the solution, you could ease some of the anxiety around it.

3. Confront your fears

This is a tough one! Now is the time, but the fear didn’t come on overnight so be realistic and know it won’t go away that fast. It takes work, courage, practice and time, just don't give up. If you have a fear of dogs, maybe meet with a friend that you know has a dog that is SAFE for you to sit in the room with and work toward interaction. I wouldn’t say run off and visit an animal shelter and share the stress and anxiety of those poor critters, but you get the idea. Whatever the fear is, it’s time to take the steps toward getting past it. My fear of public speaking and judgments will soon be confronted, and I will be going live on Facebook!, and even though I will probably struggle it for months to come, I am doing this because it is all that holds me back.

4. Seek a therapist or professional

Sometimes confronting your fears or discussing them with a family member may not be sufficient. You continue to carry or feel your fear, which disables you from moving forward in life. A therapist can provide you with the help you need to decipher the reasons behind your fears and ways to heal and defeat them.

5. Mind, Body, Spirit

Yoga, meditation, and aromatherapy are all great avenues toward finding a true way to release the stress developed in your body due to the fears. All have worked for me. Conquering your fears will take time and effort. Don’t get discouraged with the amount of time it will take. Patience is a virtue, but courage to continue is key.

Remember, there is no rush. As long as you are preparing yourself mentally and physically to overcome your fears, that is a huge life improvement. If you follow one or all of the suggestions above, chances are you will be a step closer to overpowering your fears and becoming an even stronger you.

Best wishes and many blessings,

Meg